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B is for Perfection

(do not click this - it is merely a screen grab. if you would like to see THE ACTUAL performance then click on THIS LINK... and ting)

last sunday i had the pleasure of being a guest performer and one of the judges for a... talent... showcase in church (more on The Church HERE). it was good to perform. besides - i thought- if i can dedicate my time to other important things (like Erotic Art Week for example - full report later) surely i can take some time out for The Church that helped me grow.

NOW!
like i said earlier - i was also a judge or rather... a commentator. and i had already determined that i was going to be Simon Cowell. but that was hard, because as i sat down to each perfromance i started to realise two things.
A. "We are getting irritated"
B. ""Why am i feeling so smug? IS this smug or maybe it's just irritability?"

why was i so irritable? i mean the idea was to SHOWCASE FUTURE talents. there was still a lot of molding and grooming to be had but... i don't know... Christians by all intents and standards sometimes get real lazy. i should know! i reeeeeeaaaaal lazy. and it annoyed me that these people are coming to perform... to MINISTER and some of them were just... there.

like there was this one girl who read a poem about God and afterwards i asked her "How do you feel about God?" because what i got out of her with that piece was just "i'm-saying-all-the-things-that-i-think-these-people-want-to-hear" and i got annoyed.
listen, if God is a big marshmallow to you then write a piece -
"THE LORD IS LIKE A MARSHMALLOW. HE COMFORTS ME IMMENSELY!"

i don't understand why people who claim to be have the power of the Living God within them... ACT inferior. how is it that non-religious people strive to be excellent and we just... do... whatever. i myself am supremely guilty of doing that. i can write [and good too] so... you know, whatever. but of late i've been feeling like i need to do more -BE MORE. and i'm going to. i'm going to be bloody well excellent.

i wish everyone felt that way. or maybe they do and [once again] i'm being really smug about the whole thing.

help.

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