1. A Charlie Brown cartoon once explained Father’s Day like this: Charlie was going to make his father take him to the zoo and play catch with him and all those things that would eventually tire dad out. By the end of the day he said, his dad would KNOW that he was a father. Classic really.
2. Today is Generic Day. No doubt countless fathers will be receiving generic pieces of crap that they could buy FOR THEMSELVES on any given month end. And with the advent of groovy electronics, the thinking process for gift giving is now cut in half. Why should we think about what to give the old fart when Blackberry has a PlayBook… with Apps. Personally I think each Father’s Day gift should be memorable. For example, one year I thought of getting my dad a pound of rope and a hand of bananas… you figure it out. This year I planned to call him up and play Lady Gaga’s Judas for him.
S.F.X: Riiiiiiiiinnnng
Dad: Halo? [he’s Guyanese]
Gaga: Judas! Ju-da-ahs! Judas! Ju-da-ahs! Judas! Ju-da-ahs!
Me: Happy Father’s Day dad.
S.F.X: CLICK.
3. One time my dear friend told me of a future conversation he’d have with his son – “Son, uncle Tracy real cool and all eh but he believe in God and magic and shit.” I still crack up
4. One time I walked past a building and saw my father’s reflection. It disgusted me. See I am the first; I am the one who looks like him; I am the one he claimed wasn’t his; I am the one on the receiving end of broken promises… yet I am the one still working and trying to be an intellectual while his daughter has two children [first one when she was 19 I think] and his last son has something of a criminal record. Life is priceless. Technically I am the only one who hasn’t “shamed” him. I wonder how I can give him a coronary? Hey dad, I like boys. BUDOP! Faints. I’d wager that in terms of rebellion, there could be nothing greater that a son could tell his father. Because if you do poorly at school – “learn a trade”, he’d say; if you got into a fight he’d say – “boys will be boys” and internally, he’d grin but to say to your father that you like guys may yet be the winner. Even if you don’t – try it, watch his face break into a thousand shards. iChuckle.
5. Last year I wrote a piece for Father’s day in church – Our Fathers [who art on earth] where I mused over the lot of fathers who suck. Those non-existent ones… especially those who live in the home; those who left the molding of young minds [male and female] to the mothers, teachers, priests and scientists… every one BUT themselves. Now this does not mean there are not excellent fathers. I know a good few who I know will see to it that their children are overwhelmed with love and right forward thinking. I salute you.
6. And to those children whose fathers were less/are less than honorable, take hold of this fact… they get old. And when they do, they will seek you out because no one will put up with their shite forever. And they shall try to “make up” for the “indiscretions” of their youth. And it shall come to pass that they may yet try to buy the love you no longer have or need from them. For your sake, forgive them. It will bring you peace and, if nothing else, it will put the pen in your hand as executor of their will and the one who pulls the plug.
Happy father’s day all…
haha, i want gaga to phone me now!
ReplyDeleteclassic. vitally.
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