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B is for I, The Lover

The lover will never be loved as the lovee
The lover will never know love as the lovee does
He’s the guy who wants to take you to pan finals even though you hate it
Even though you don’t understand the big deal
He wants to wrap his arms around you as the bass pan bumps
And whisper in your ear, the notes that the band is playing
Bum. Bum. Bum-bumpity-bump. Bum-bum-bumpity bump….

And you laugh. You laugh at first because his breath tickles your ear
You laugh because he probably skipped a beat – he who professes love of pan
Knows nothing
Knows less than you
But then the sound makes sense
The rhythm of the steel-pan moves with the light swaying of his hips
Moves with the tapping of his hands on your hands on your gut
And you feel
In your gut
That this is love. A tenor pan and a guitar pan
And a lover who’s trying to get you to understand
That this is love
Past could be and maybe… this is love.
But you will never know, never fully love him the way he loved you
He pursued, you perused
You feel into his lust
Some deep sea. Strange and warm waters…
He pulled you to the shore and wrapped a blanket over you
Pulled your hair back so you could recognise
So you could see
The lover will never be loved as much as the lovee
You will never fully know what it is to love me.

“I, the Lover”
Tracy j H

*just listened to some good pan. watch it HERE  I figured... the momentary human would not get Steel Pan. but it's fun to dream. 


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